Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize