He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize