i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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