I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
