i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
