As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
