Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
