sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize