You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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