trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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