Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
