I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
home. puking in laundry basket.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
You did what with his pubic hair?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
