just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
