i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize