Don't you send me to vm
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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