If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
