Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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