ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I hate all girls vehemently.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
