Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize
