My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
