drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
