Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Randomize
