Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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