just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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