...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
