remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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