some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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