I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
