you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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