maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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