I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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