I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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