the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
