google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
