White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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