She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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