I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
