his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
