And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
