So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
