Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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