Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
