And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize