why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
