Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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