I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I've blown a few things in my day
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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