Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
