Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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