Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
