Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
